garden · memory impairment

The Waiting Game

The radish queen

ANNNND, still no answers. Waiting for my MRI results and all my neuro tests to be sent to my Dr. at Barnes. Can I volunteer to go photocopy it myself and drive it down because it’s 5 13 8 weeks later (Shit, I cannot keep track of time. )*circle back* and I am positive I could get it mailed or hand delivered faster.

My family still gets to hear me repeat myself but I’m working hard at taking better care of myself. I’m making the hubby walk with me and got him a FitBit so we can challenge the kids. My only concession to junk food is tortilla chips and guac. I mean, c’mon, it’s guac. The good fats, right? I have lost 5 pounds in a couple of weeks. I just have to be careful of when I am outside because too much sun= flare.

The garden is looking killer. I’ve been teaching little miss to pick radishes. I tell her the big ones are yelling “pick me” at her. She even takes them and washes them for me. Not a fan of the taste though. These are French Breakfast radishes which are so beautiful.


This is kinda all over the place, but hey, so am I.

memory impairment

brain cage

Tomorrow is brain cage day, also known as brain MRI day. I’m not even claustrophobic and it makes me antsy. The good thing is that my visit at Barnes turned out really well. No obvious issue like dementia. The neurologist seems to think that perhaps my sleep is my problem. We’re doing an MRI to compare to my baseline from 2015 and see if there are any differences and if not, I’ll be seeing a sleep neurologist. I already have a CPAP so it’s pretty unlikely that is the problem. I’m a real tosser and turner plus wake up a lot so I can see that being an issue. I’ll tell you, just getting through that appointment was a major stress reducer for me. I was so nervous. I mean, it’s my brain! No one wants a crapped out brain. I’m hoping we can get me back to normal so I’m not forgetting everything all the time. I’ve got quite a while before that becomes my daily life.

I have begun doing squats at my desk and am out in the garden. My heart rate has dropped significantly in the past few weeks. Exercise plus lower stress levels all the way around are certainly helpful. Here’s hoping for more good news tomorrow.

get shit straight · life · memory impairment · Memory Loss · Plannermania · Uncategorized

Memory aids

Having memory issues is a scary thing. I forget appointments and events; I forget to go to the grocery store, pay bills, etc. I bought my first daily planner ever, a Day Designer. I used to use weekly planners because it was the most efficient for me. Now I have to write down everything so daily is the way to go. I like the simplicity of it. It has the sections I need but isn’t fussy so I’m not distracted,

My planner/diary/way through life.

My birthday was Saturday. My husband bought me what I have been dying to have, an Amazon Echo, and I love it. I already have it set up to turn off some lights. I set timers for cooking and reminders to turn off the stove. I add items to the grocery list while I’m in the kitchen looking in the pantry. I tell it where my keys are when I get home and it remembers for me. God, what a handy fucking tool for me,

I also have an Apple watch. My Dr. suggested it for reminders about medication and appointments. It has helped tremendously. It just gives me reminders until I complete the task. It also has a breathing app so I can remember to slow down and focus.

I use Grammarly and Lingofy for spelling and grammar while I write to maintain my previous level of ability. They don’t catch every mistake but proofreading helps too, as I recognize the error even if it takes a bit to figure it out. I also use the Lingofy AP guidebook for professional questions while I work, rather than second guess it.

My vocabulary and IQ are still high, my memory processing speed is the biggest hit right now which means it takes me longer to do the same tasks. Sometimes following a sewing pattern pisses me off-putting sleeves on incorrectly or the like. Of course, I did those things before and laughed them off. I’m so much harder on myself now. Long, productive days are exhausting. I come home wiped out just from concentrating so hard.

There’s hope, I haven’t been diagnosed yet, so perhaps I have a reversible or manageable problem. Then again, maybe I have dementia. At 48 fucking years old. No matter what, I want an answer to my problems, whether the outcome is desirable or not. I’ll tell you this, I never had a honeymoon or even a vacation with my husband and if the clock is ticking on my brain, that will be priority one. I want to make as many great memories for me and my family while I can.